I wanted to publish this post on my birthday, but I figured I’d be too busy replying to facebook birthday wishes from “friends” who got notified to celebrate it with me by wishing me a “Happy birthday”! On second thoughts, I might remove my birthday from facebook anyway!
I’ll be 33 in a few days and I’ve never been at ease with my age or myself like I am now. I don’t hate my body anymore, I’ve accepted all my curves & how much I weigh and figured that weight, just like age, is just a number! This doesn’t mean that I won’t be eating healthy any more, but wouldn’t freak out on the extra kilos I might put on…
I’m witnessing the birth of facial wrinkles, especially on the sides of my eyes but that’s OK! In fact I’m thankful I haven’t grown any between my eyes, because as I age, I’ll not grow into that forever angry face due to those nasty lines on the front. I’d hate to be stuck in that look! I have always loved dimples and I like to think that I’ve been granted one in my thirties. I can see it when I smile, a tiny one on my right cheek… Could it be another wrinkle claiming its right to appear? who cares? It’s just a point of view anyway 🙂
I have tricked my hair and dyed it many times over the years way before any gray hairs appear. In fact I haven’t seen any till now, pretty smart eh? I still like to take weird poses when having my photograph taken, I would love to race with anyone who challenges me to, even though I’ve never won any race my whole life but it makes me genuinely happy to grasp for breath and feel that ache in my stomach and knees, to hear my heartbeats in my throat! I would still draw on foggy windows then say it wasn’t me. I don’t think I would ever stop watching cartoon animations and will always get emotional and involved with the characters and would never be ashamed of weeping in public…
I’m still single, but that’s OK! And my message here is to all the ones who love me and care about me: Getting married is not my biggest of worries. It’s no fun ride, at least that’s not how I view it. I’m not against it but I still have the same high standards I’ve always had and time won’t bend that or break it! It’s annoying and it hurts to see people you love hurling around to make sure you get married. I will not get married to an old guy just because I’m not in my twenties anymore and no I can’t accept someone who is divorced with four kids for marriage’s sake! I’m an independent working woman, I don’t need to throw away all my social life accomplishments or compromise anything that I’ve achieved just to please a potential husband. If I ever get married, it should be because I want to not because that’s the best thing I can get due to my age! Or because I must have a baby of my own!
Sentences like, what’s wrong? Or why are the guys so blind? Or why are you so picky? are really annoying and sometimes hurtful… I understand you want me to be happy but who said happiness is only achieved through marriage? Who said I’m not happy? I’d rather fall in love than have kids or raise someone else’s kids!
I’m single not incomplete dear society, a woman can be unmarried and happy, those two things are not related. You want me to be happy? Offer me a flight to India or Uzbekistan! Teach me a few tricks in photography! Would you go skydiving with me? I would really love to ride a Harley Davidson! Take away all the smart phones and communicate with me! I want to watch a musical! Fall in love and be loved back!