Like a rain drop falling from above knowing it will hit the soil and break with dirt, that’s how she felt. Is falling in love similar to falling from the skies? And is crashing with the ground similar to heart breaking? Was it love? If not, it is destructive fascination for sure. His heart pounding astray is slowly killing her…
Never in her life had she wished to be younger like this time. He invaded her thoughts, intoxicated her mind and made her submissive, something that was never like her. He tamed the rebellious beast inside her not by his charms and looks, which he had, but by the power of his words and thoughts. They were opposites. He engulfed himself with the serenity she always lacked. It was his best feature.
Deep inside, she knew he will leave but she was pleased with his presence around no matter how pathetic it sounded or how short it was going to be. He was completely taken by the writer that she was and ever since she discovered that, the ink in her veins that poured on her papers completely dried, letters and words conspired against her and abandoned her. She stopped writing. She saw herself as an amateur, while he thought she was all that. He quoted her, discussed books and literary views with her, the things that made her more and more attached to him.
To accept what comes your way is not necessarily passive living, you get there after years and years of realizing that what will be will be no matter how hard you fight it or fight for it. This is why she understands that in the journey of life, hers, she is but an oasis or maybe a train station and not home. Those who come to her merely take a break from their travels no matter how long they stayed. No matter how comfortable they get around her, she will never be a final destination to anyone…
Next time you hit a station, listen carefully, for amidst the fiasco of life you might hear the walls discretely weeping. Those who leave without goodbye are the most tender hearted for they will never see you cry…
